Just be yourself…

Wow!!! Its really been a long time. I wouldn’t exactly say I have been busy but maybe I have. Anyways I’m here now. I just wish I could keep this going. I just met a friend, her name is… Actually non of your business… Lol… Anyways she kind of inspired me to visit my blog again… I wrote this particular piece about 8years ago. August 26, 2007 to be precise, I have added little additions to it now tho. I hope its meaningful to you!


Before you think I am trying to insult you, I am not. I am asking a very serious question, do you know what makes you special? I won’t be surprised if someone said – nothing. I am just like every other person on the street. I actually totally disagree with you though, no two people are alike. But it amazing how we so easily forget this fact.
One of lessons I ever learnt so far was that nobody can do me like me and that has contributed to me becoming the confident person I believe I am today.
I did not learn this lesson easily though, it took me going through a lot of trying times in my life and surviving. It took me discovering who I am, my passions, my likes, my dislikes, it took me laughing at my own jokes, critisizing myself and praising myself.
The one thing I used to hate was my mum comparing me with other people. I did not know back then why I felt so strongly against it but I know now. I can never be like any other person, and frankly, I do not want to be.
I never used to like looking in the mirror (I am still working on that though) because I felt I did not have a body to die for, but what amazed me was that with my less than perfect body, I still had girls flocking around me.
That thought me a very important lesson, at the end of the day, it is your attitude, character and personality that counts. People only see what you want them to see.
You need to remind yourself everyday that you were not born to fit in, you were born to stand out. If God wanted all of us to be the same, he would have made all of us identical and believe me, that would have been boring.
The best gift that you can give yourself, I believe, is to discover yourself. Everybody was born with a gift, what is yours? I remember my pastor once saying; anyone taller than you is too tall, anyone shorter than you is too short, anyone fatter than you is too fat, anyone slimmer than you is too slim.
You are perfect in all ramifications, special and unique, just the way God intended you to be, You should determine within yourself not to be a ‘chinko’ china made (there are just too many of them out there) be an original.
Celebrate yourself, appreciate your unique existence, the world is lucky to have you. Nobody can be like you.

Kindly drop any comments, criticisms, contributions below… Thanks.

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The prayer was lengthy. The prayer leader was rapping, his words incoherent, and his prayer unintelligible. My slight problem with ‘prayer’ is that it has become more like gambling. Let’s say as much as possible to God and if we are righteous or can quote copious scriptures, he would answer. ‘He is a prayer answering God, not a prayer storing God’ shouts the leader. Please……I have heard that before.

I   have always believed that the more selective, with words, one is during prayer, the more effective one would be. Jesus didn’t rap his prayer or utter lengthy, incoherent sounds. That is why His prayers were recordable. Imagine if we were required to write our prayers before saying them, we would all be very concise. One should remember the exact words said in one’s prayer. This approach would focus one’s faith and thus enhance it. Why should the potency of my prayer be judged by or be dependent on my demeanor during prayer, the volume of my voice, the violence of my gestures or the piety of my expression? Why should length take precedence over sincerity of heart? Why should communication with my maker have to be so exhausting? The picture of God forced on my mind by spiritual leaders has been one of a grand, overbearing boss, who constantly plays hard to get. Why can’t we fellowship with God over breakfast, in church? Is there a way church could be made more appealing, without diluting the spiritual content of the service?

Oya, stop! Stop! These thoughts are dangerous. They are not permitted in chapel. You don’t question the actions of the chaplaincy or of   your spiritual leaders. If you do this, it means you are not spiritual, and in extreme cases, not born again. Spiritual people just do as instructed. If they are told to pray, they pray. No questions. No opposition.

I couldn’t reconcile the voices in my head. I sat. Damn the consequences. I prepared myself to listen to the unquestionable sermon of today’s preacher. I dozed off………then the ‘grace’. Service is over.

I stepped out of chapel, hungry, disheveled and unsure of my standing with my creator, viewed through the lens of a monolithic, Pentecostal community , preaching a valid message, with the twin instruments of coercion and scare-mongering. Is scaring people into going to church and giving their lives to Christ, good evangelism? Is fear, solid bedrock for a sound Christian adventure? Oya, stop! I switched on my I-pod touch and plugged my earphones, as I strolled to my room.

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Lagos Girl

A good read for every Lagosian or aspiring to be one…

cikko's lair

I am not a Lagos girl. Zinny now is and this post is from her. NOT ME. I REPEAT, NOT ME!!!



I am a Calabar girl, born and bred. I thought I’d always be a Calabar girl… until Lagos.

I was raised every inch a lady. How to walk, how to sit, the proper decibels at which to speak given the occasion, how to observe other people’s personal space, whether standing or sitting, how to observe rules of polite behaviour when speaking, like ‘please’, ‘excuse me’, ‘may I?’, ‘sorry’, etc. These all formed part of my home training growing up, at a time when formal etiquette schools had yet to make their entrance. And about the only abusive term I was allowed use of was ‘you are silly’. My dad was that particular! So it was that I blossomed into a lovely young lady who observed etiquette and…

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